Master Debators

Did you ever have one of those days? You know, one of those days where it starts out okay, there's coffee, and enough smokes to get you through the morning... Then suddenly, one of the thousands of cats around here shits on the manuscript for a piece you've been working on for YEARS... I suspect me leaving the pages on the floor next to the cat box may have had something to do with it. It's just sitting out on the porch right now with shit all over it. I wonder what I'll do with it. I wonder if Shane ever reads this. He'd probably laugh his ass off.

I watched the debate the other night. How embarrassing. I don't talk about our leaders when I talk about how great Canada is. Canada is a wonderful country despite (or in spite of) it's citizenry. I like Harper best, though. One of the other bastards wants to tax estates so the can get at even move of your AFTER TAX BUCKS. I guess capital gains on the house isn't good enough for them. Maybe the NDP should take away ALL POSSETIONS when a citizen reaches the age of majority. THAT will level the playing field. Naive Bastards.

But Harper, I dunno... he' got that cool Kennedy hair, and all. And who could forget JFK? He fucked Marilyn. Too bad Tony Curtis wasn't running. The other two? One just wants to steal some of your money, the other wants to steal A WHOLE PROVINCE.

Who's in da hou? Eleanor Zelnick, that's who. Hear her read one of her short classic poems "Colours". Eleanor, as you may remember, was the first woman spokesperson for a leading brand of adult diapers. When questioned by a reporter on whether she used that brand herself, she replied "What, you think I shit myself?"

She was fired, and has been living on a float home in North Vancouver ever since.